4th semester...CHECK!

Sak Pase!

PROLOGUE: I wrote half of this post a few days before my exams and saved it as a draft to get back to it later after my exams. I'm a firm believer in speaking it into existence, or writing it in this case. Speak what you want out into the universe and it will come to pass. And it worked yet again. The only things I'm typing up RIGHT now is this prologue and the part of the post that starts with this ----> "But LET ME TELL Y'ALL ABOUT PHARMACOLOGY." and ends with this ----> "glad that's over lol." Read on....


Please accept my apology for this long hiatus. This semester has been A STRUGGLE Y'ALL. This semester definitely tested my steadfastness and my strength. Suffice to say, God definitely has his hands on me and I couldn't be more grateful. Here's what you missed in list form lol...

• I was nominated for the AUC Student Judiciary Committee Dr. Karl Stockhausen's Student of the Semester award and y'all I wonnnnn! I'm your May 2019 Student of the semester! A friend of mine nominated me without letting me know smh and with all that was going on with me I wasn't going to do it but I had a chance to help someone else so how horrible of a person i would be if i didn't at least try. The winner of the award gets a 5,000 dollar scholarship to donate to an organization of their choice on the island. Remember the preschool I volunteered at last semester? I decided to donate it to them. They will be purchasing an interactive whiteboard to make it easier to teach the kiddies. 

        Also here's a screenshot of a friend and fellow student on SJC who made the announcement on                    AUC's student announcements Facebook page, and he used a BOMB picture of me too haha.

• I passed all of my final exams you guysss. AND I THINK I might be qualified to enter the honor society here at AUC for my next and last semester. You need an 85 percent overall GPA throughout all of your semesters here to make the honor society so we shall see. AND yayy to Dean's list again? But LET ME TELL Y'ALL ABOUT PHARMACOLOGY. Y'all I don't know how I passed that class. I mean, I reaaallly dont know. My finals were yesterday. I took Path II first, then the Pharm exam, then the neuro exam. Path went okay, neuro went okay, Pharm...omg. It was 70 questions and i marked about 45 questions for review during the exam because I didn't know them. But I ended up getting right about average in the grades. The grades weren't released until midnight smh. I'm glad that's over lol. 

• Finallyyyyyy, the talent show! The BMSA Talent show was Aug 2nd. I performed two songs this time. It went more than wonderful, I enjoyed myself and got to share my feelings through song on stage. I even teared up a little bit on the last song...craazyy. I will insert some talent show pictures and also the recordings of my two songs at the end of this post if you guys want to watch. The first song is called "Say you love me" by Jessie Ware and the second one is called "You don't know" by Katelyn Tarver. I apologize in advance for the bad quality. Uploading it to youtube changed the quality. 

4th semester...CHECK! I am now a 5th semester student y'all, my last semester on the island! Its going to be a challenging semester but your girl got this. Don't get me wrong i'm worried as hell,  I have sooo so many issues with family and my personal life and I'm afraid that it will get in the way of my studies like it did this semester. But I've made it through this far so I'll keep pushing despite all the odds. Thank to everyone who's been reading and following me on this journey, I hope I make you proud and bring about some inspiration in your life. Little ole me is making it through medical school successfully so far and if I can do it, anyone can do it.

Say you love me by Jessie ware

You don't know by Katelyn Tarver

TTYL!!!!

Les updates

Sak Pase!

So, first midterms are over (since June 5th actually) and I've been too lazy to do anything since then. So lazy that I haven't even started studying for one of my classes yet and I'm at least 3 days behind on the other two. Yep, I'm THAT behind. Before you say anything...I know, I know, I'm a BAD medical student and I should know better than to let these lectures pile up like that. I'm a bad influence and not a good role model. But to be honest, I'm having a moment. I'm without motivation, I'm tired (mentally) and I just have no stamina to be studying 8-10 hours a day right now. I am not depressed, I'm just DRAINED of physical, social and mental energy. Behind on lectures, laundry is piling up, I haven't actually cooked in weeks, and I've been sleeping and sleeping nonstop. Okay now stop thinking that....I'm not pregnant either 👀

I have experienced this before and like I said, I'm just tired. My mind is racing too much so I needed the time off, I've had it off and now its back to business. My mind does that lol, it's stubborn and it needs breaks. Until it gets a break, i'll just be sitting in front of my laptop, wasting my time watching lectures without actually learning anything. Can we say #SelfCare or nah? #TreatYoself #LifesTooshort

Let's talk about midterms. I did PRETTY well on Neuro and Path II for Exams 1A. Pharm, well....that needed a LOT of work. Through sketchy pharm, tutoring slides and Anki Decks I managed to bring my grade up significantly on Exam 1B. *Pats self on back* I really hope I can catch up this weekend so I can get back to going to classes by Monday. Also, Intro to Clinical medicine (ICM 4) has started so now I'm back to dressing doctor, physical exams and focused patients interviews, oh my! There's no more time to lollygag, I gotta pretend doctor!

The Dean's list ceremony of academic excellence is next Friday, June 21st so I'll see if my beloved friends (AUC and back home) can take some pics of me to share with you all. Community Action Day is next Saturday! CAD is a semesterly event that AUC puts on where students sign up to go volunteer in the St. Maarten community. Whatever interests you really, there are road clean ups, working with kids, planting trees, helping serve ice cream. It's a beautiful thing. You get a free t-shirt and breakfast too!

Finally, thank you to every one who's been following this blog. I've received many emails from people with questions and comments and believe it or not, each and every time I would get nervous because I always want to make sure I'm helping you or answering your questions to your liking. I know how anxious I was when I made the decision to come to AUC and how great it felt knowing that there were people out there I could reach out to for answers.

TTYL!

AUC Match Day List

Sak Pase!

Short post! I just wanted to post a link to AUC's 2019 Residency Placements. AUC reported a 90 percent residency attainment rate this year and had 349 residency placements. If you want to check out where students got matched check it out ----> Here . I check this list every year because I want to see what residency programs are open to international medical graduates so I can start prepping my list. It's never too early.

Exams are in a week and I think I'm playing with fire because I'm sooooo behind in like every class y'all and I find it hard to study because problems keep coming at me left and right. Because I'm stressing, I keep getting my migraines and they're worst than they've ever been. I feel like I'm being tested. Pray for me.

TTYL!

I Wish I Wish

Sak Pase!

To begin this post, my good friend's family was in a horrible accident and I mean HORRIBLE. Their car got hit by a drunk driver. If you're able to help, please take the time to donate to their gofundme. They are in A LOT of debt and they need as much help as they can get. If you're not able to donate, please share the link on your social media pages and to your friends and family. Thank you in advance. Here is the link---> gf.me/u/snf7a9

Y'all I'M A 4TH SEMESTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The plan was for me to post right after exams but I was so excited to be done with third semester that I didn't go anywhere near my laptop. I had PTSD. Classes start tomorrow but my brain is still on vacation mode until further notice. I'm not ready for more of this torture so I'm just going to stay in denial and convince myself that I have one more week to vacay.

This past semester came for my life and it came in full force but I DID IT Y'ALL, I made the dean's list again and honored two courses. Let me brag a little, I gotta learn to pat myself on the back. Buttttt YET AGAIN, just like in Phys I, I came so close to honoring Phys II....like 1 percent away but I didn't 😑 Beggars can't be choosers so I have no regrets.

I am grateful for this semester, I learned a lot and God showed up and showed out. I don't know what I would do or where I would be without prayer. I didn't think doing well this semester was going to happen but it did. I need to believe in myself a little more because this self-doubt thing is getting a little old. It's getting A LOT old. I'm tired of the anxiety and the panic attacks I go through each semester because my brain wants to overthink and convince itself that I do not belong here. Every morning, I must remind myself "Bettyna you've made this far which means you have the ability to go even further." EVERY MORNING. That's my pep talk to me. That's how I'm able to get up and study every day. Well, almost every day because some mornings, the pep talk doesn't work so I either remain in bed, cry, pray, or watch youtube videos. I have issues but I embrace them. I'm working on them everyday. I'm sharing this because I don't want anyone reading this to think that this all comes easy for me because that would be so far from the truth. I have to deal with personal bullshit, family bullshit, financial bullshit while I med skooool but that's part of life. I have to remind myself that others have it worst (or is it worse?) than I do. I have to remind myself that this isn't just for me. This is for the people who came before me who didn't have the choice to do all this. Those who came before me who couldn't dare DREAM. I have the freedom to not only dream but to live out those dreams. These reminders are what gets me up. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don't. When they don't, I just let it be and I take a day off. WAAAAAAAA? A med student taking the day OFF? Yep! This past semester, there was a point in time where I took a whole week off from studying. That meant more work for me later but when you can't....you just CAN'T! It's okay to take a day off. Cuz what am I? Superwoman? I wish.

Without further ado, introducing my new classes for this semester: ICM IV, PATH II, PHARMACOLOGY, and NEUROSCIENCE. I heard Pharm is worse than med micro and y'all know how much I suffered in med micro. So I guess Pharm and I are going to be on an uphill battle. I know myself and myself doesn't do quite well with memorization, I do better with concepts. Med micro and Pharm are both rote memorization so you see how that's an issue for me. Yeesh, wish me luck.

Just a little fun fact..... My goal at AUC is not to make dean's list or honor a class every semester. That goal was only set for my second semester because I had something I wanted to prove to MYSELF. After I met my goal that second semester, my goal then changed. In other words, my goal now is to NOT FAIL A CLASS no matter what hell I must go through. So please don't EXPECT me to make the list every semester. If I do, then great. If I don't...did I pass my classes with 70 percent or above that semester? Yes? then I am satisfied. Dean's list is just the icing on the cake y'all....it's important that you remember that. Shoutout to the people who made it to the next semester. For those who have to repeat a class, shoutout to you too. You'll get 'em next time. You're doing something that a lot of people wouldn't dare do. You're doing something that others find almost impossible. Look at you dawg!! LOOK AT YOUU! Also a big shoutout to the ones at AUC who have always been there to help a girl out. I mean they're always there! Y'all know who you are!

I wish, I wish with all my heart to excel this semester in a land called med school. *

TTYL!


*I hope y'all caught the "Dragon Tales" reference 😉